>stand up from desk with a clear mission
>walk through the kitchen doorway
>stand in front of the open fridge staring at a jar of mustard for 20 seconds
>zero recollection of why I came in here
>walk back to desk and immediately remember
Feels like a Sims player just cancelled my action queue.
>3:30 PM at work: barely keeping eyes open, yawning every 4 minutes, "I'm going to sleep so early tonight"
>11:45 PM in bed: wide awake researching how deep-sea submarine cables are repaired and how parmesan cheese is graded
Every single weeknight.
>working on the car for 15 minutes
>set the 10mm socket down for 1.4 seconds
>vanishes into thin air
>drop the backup 10mm socket into the engine bay
>*clink... clack... silence* (never touches the garage floor)
Somewhere in an alternate universe there is a pile of 400 million 10mm sockets.
>find a weird 4-line function written 9 years ago by a dev who left the company
>looks completely redundant
>comment it out to clean up the file
>three unrelated services fail and the printer starts speaking Latin
>uncomment it immediately, add // DO NOT TOUCH, git commit & push
If it works in production, leave it in peace.
>8 years old at grandma's house
>spot the royal blue Danish butter cookie tin on the shelf
>open the lid expecting delicious shortbread cookies
>it's 47 spools of thread, three thimbles, and buttons from 1983
How did every grandma on Earth coordinate this before the internet existed?
>3:30 PM at work: barely keeping eyes open, yawning every 4 minutes, "I'm going to sleep so early tonight"
>11:45 PM in bed: wide awake researching how deep-sea submarine cables are repaired and how parmesan cheese is graded
Every single weeknight.
>find a weird 4-line function written 9 years ago by a dev who left the company
>looks completely redundant
>comment it out to clean up the file
>three unrelated services fail and the printer starts speaking Latin
>uncomment it immediately, add // DO NOT TOUCH, git commit & push
If it works in production, leave it in peace.
>find a weird 4-line function written 9 years ago by a dev who left the company
>looks completely redundant
>comment it out to clean up the file
>three unrelated services fail and the printer starts speaking Latin
>uncomment it immediately, add // DO NOT TOUCH, git commit & push
If it works in production, leave it in peace.
>8 years old at grandma's house
>spot the royal blue Danish butter cookie tin on the shelf
>open the lid expecting delicious shortbread cookies
>it's 47 spools of thread, three thimbles, and buttons from 1983
How did every grandma on Earth coordinate this before the internet existed?
>it moves and it shouldn't: use duct tape
>it doesn't move and it should: use WD-40
>it still makes a weird noise: turn the radio volume up
400 years of mechanical engineering distilled into three lines.
>find a weird 4-line function written 9 years ago by a dev who left the company
>looks completely redundant
>comment it out to clean up the file
>three unrelated services fail and the printer starts speaking Latin
>uncomment it immediately, add // DO NOT TOUCH, git commit & push
If it works in production, leave it in peace.
>all day from 9 AM to 11 PM: sleeps like a Victorian aristocrat on the sofa
>3:14 AM when I have to wake up early: *sprints across the hallway at Mach 3, knocks a glass off the table, meows at the wall*
Still the best roommate I've ever had
>stand up from desk with a clear mission
>walk through the kitchen doorway
>stand in front of the open fridge staring at a jar of mustard for 20 seconds
>zero recollection of why I came in here
>walk back to desk and immediately remember
Feels like a Sims player just cancelled my action queue.
>it moves and it shouldn't: use duct tape
>it doesn't move and it should: use WD-40
>it still makes a weird noise: turn the radio volume up
400 years of mechanical engineering distilled into three lines.
>try to plug in USB-A flash drive
>doesn't go in
>flip it 180 degrees
>still doesn't go in
>flip it back to the original orientation
>slides right in smoothly
Quantum physicists need to study the USB connector.
>find a weird 4-line function written 9 years ago by a dev who left the company
>looks completely redundant
>comment it out to clean up the file
>three unrelated services fail and the printer starts speaking Latin
>uncomment it immediately, add // DO NOT TOUCH, git commit & push
If it works in production, leave it in peace.
>try to plug in USB-A flash drive
>doesn't go in
>flip it 180 degrees
>still doesn't go in
>flip it back to the original orientation
>slides right in smoothly
Quantum physicists need to study the USB connector.
>all day from 9 AM to 11 PM: sleeps like a Victorian aristocrat on the sofa
>3:14 AM when I have to wake up early: *sprints across the hallway at Mach 3, knocks a glass off the table, meows at the wall*
Still the best roommate I've ever had
>stand up from desk with a clear mission
>walk through the kitchen doorway
>stand in front of the open fridge staring at a jar of mustard for 20 seconds
>zero recollection of why I came in here
>walk back to desk and immediately remember
Feels like a Sims player just cancelled my action queue.
>3:30 PM at work: barely keeping eyes open, yawning every 4 minutes, "I'm going to sleep so early tonight"
>11:45 PM in bed: wide awake researching how deep-sea submarine cables are repaired and how parmesan cheese is graded
Every single weeknight.